What The Rurouni Kenshin Cast Would Never Say
by DemonicAngel16
Summary: Welcome to the things that the Rurouni Kenshin cast would never be caught dead saying. This 3rd chapter's victim is YAHIKO! I also changed the rating to PG just for future reference...
1. Sano

ATTENTION!!!!  
  
The first chapter is down because I accidentally uploaded something that was incorrect in its place. Oh and for any inconvenience I would like to say..... too bad, you'll just have to wait while I try and dig out the file from my lousy database. Meanwhile, you can try to pronounce this name:  
  
Nicholas Dokonokuminomonjawaresumakikishiteshizumetarokokora Wolfwood  
  
I'll probably have the first chapter up and running before then. If you do manage to pronounce it correctly, you can try to look it up and see what it means. Later!  
  
AM 


	2. Kaoru

Allison: Hello and welcome back to my fic of doom! I just realized after two minutes after the first chapter came out that I had forgotten the disclaimer. How foolish of me! Gah! Sometimes I can just forget anything. I bet some people I know have those moments too.... And they know who they are. Haha!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Rurouni Kenshin and I probably never will! (Remember that this disclaimer counts for the first chapter too!)  
  
We'll continue with my little conversation between me and Sano.....NOW!  
  
Allison: You think Kaoru is...  
  
Kaoru: (Walks in.)  
  
Allison: The only girl you want to marry, have kids with, and wants to stare at her all day!  
  
Kaoru: O.O( )  
  
Sano: (faints with face a deep crimson color anime style)  
  
Allison: Well I'll let you too work it out while I satisfy these people with today's victim... Kaoru!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Chapter 2: What Koaru would never be caught dead saying.  
  
Kaoru: (Blushing deeeeeep crimson red.) You have got to be kidding me!  
  
Allison: Sorry. Everyone has to go through this. If you want you can pick who goes next.  
  
Kaoru: Um....Ok.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Kenshin! I hate you! I never want to see you again!"  
  
"You're right Sano! I am a stupid little girl!"  
  
"I suck at swordsmanship! Yahiko should be the master."  
  
"I look ugly in a kimono."  
  
"Who wants some of my horrible cooking that I spend so much time working on and never seem to get any better at it?"  
  
"Guess what, Kenshin! I sold your reverse-blade sword on e-Bay for $20! What a good deal!"  
  
"No that's ok, Kenshin, I'll do all the work from now on. You just go sit and relax while I do everything!"  
  
"C'mon everyone! It's time for our daily worship to our superior, Yahiko!"  
  
"Maybe Miss Megumi is right! I am a sweaty little girl!"  
  
"Look at me! I'm a pretty princess!"  
  
"Hey look at the pretty little birdie! How it flaps its wings! Fly away little birdie!"  
  
"Yo * beep* * beep * yo * bleeeepin bleeeeep *" (A/N: You can fill in the blanks. Use your imagination!)  
  
"Why don't you take care of your own wounds, Kenshin! You lazy jerk!"  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Allison: Well, that's about it for this chapter.  
  
Kaoru: Thank God! One more and I would've personally taken you out!  
  
Sano: Excuse me! But who was the first victim here?!  
  
Kaoru: I don't care which one you were. I would've knocked her out long before you had the gut to challenged the author.  
  
Sano: That's it little missy! Bedtime!  
  
Kaoru: Bring it on!  
  
Allison: Whoa! That's not a pretty site. So while they're distracting themselves from killing me I'm going to mention all the reviewers to show how much I really care:  
  
~Tiger of the Sonicboom  
  
~Jonouchi-Luvr-247  
  
~Racyone  
  
~Tusuami  
  
~Battousi Girl  
  
~liz  
  
~Hiei-lover347  
  
~TanukiGirl22  
  
~KK kisu  
  
~Imalefty  
  
~Weasel1029  
  
~Neko-Kyolover  
  
~Kitsune-Onna19  
  
~Zhen Ji  
  
Allison: There! All done-  
  
Sano: Why are we fighting each other when we can be fighting her?!  
  
Kaoru: Yeah! Let's get her!  
  
Allison: See ya later! I've gotta run for my life! Don't forget to review! 


	3. Yahiko

Daaaah-Da-Da-Dat-Dat-Dat-Da-DAAAAAAA!!! "Hello and welcome back to the Channel 7 1/2 news! Today's top story; a brilliant young author displays, on a public FanFiction website, the story 'Things that the Rurouni Ketchup Cast Would Never Say'...." Someone from behind the camera runs up and whispers something into the reporter's ear. "Sorry, there was a mispronunciation earlier. It's actually 'Things that the Rurouni Kenshin Cast Would Never Say' We were lucky enough to get a coveted copy from the author herself but most unfortunate not to get an interview for," pauses to read a small note, "reasons unknown. The copy's subtitle reads 'Things Yahiko would never Say' But we will show you the copy but to first show you the disclaimer:  
  
Disclaimer: By the power invested in me, I hereby announce that the series titled Rurouni Kenshin does not belong to me but some very fortunate Japanese creator.  
  
Click! (A/N- that means the TV turned off.)  
  
Allison-See! I told you that me telling people what you would never say would make you famous!  
  
Sano-I don't care what they say! I'm still not gonna let you get away with making fun of me!  
  
Kaoru- Or me!  
  
Yahiko- Or me!  
  
Sano- Shut up! She hasn't done you yet!  
  
Yahiko-So? What do you think this chapter is about?!  
  
Allison- Well aaaanyway, let's get to the story!  
  
Things Yahiko Would Never Say/Do Ch. 3   
  
"Koaru, will you marry me?"  
  
"I'm the stupidest swordsman in all of Japan, well, besides Kenshin."  
  
"I think I'll shave my head bald." Bzzzzzzzz......  
  
"Why do I have to use a stupid wooden stick anyway, I know! So I can whack Kenshin with it!" KRACK!! Walks away "I don't want a real sword anyway...."  
  
Looks around and sneaks into a stall in a girl's bathroom with a bag in his hand. There is someone in the stall next too him. He takes a D-cup bra out of his bag and drops it on the floor where the girl in the stall next to him can see it and starts to sing 'Born Free'..  
  
Dials a number on the phone. "Hello, is this..." pauses to read the phone book, "Donald Finkleburg? Well you've just won 100,000,000 yen for having the weirdest name in Japan..." (A/N: Me and my friends had a lot of fun with that. Remember, 67 is your friend...)  
  
"This love has taken it's toll on me..."  
  
"Nah, I don't wanna train today, I'll just sit here and enjoy Kaoru's delicious food!"  
  
"I can't train today Kenshin, I'm late for my meeting to get in touch of my feminine side. Wait! Does this kimono make me look fat?"  
  
"Yay! It's time to have fun with duct tape!"  
  
"Dude, Where's my car??"  
  
"Hey everyone! Just to let everyone know, you guys can all call me little Yahiko."  
  
"Screw training, I'm gonna go watch TV."  
  
Allison: Well I hope you all enjoyed that!  
  
Sano: Haha! I sure did!  
  
Kaoru: Me too!  
  
Yahiko: Well I didn't! So you guys can all shut up!  
  
Sano: You wanna say that to my face, punk?  
  
Yahiko:I think I will: SHUT UP!!  
  
Sano: That's it! You're becoming a permanent part of the floor!  
  
Yahiko: Make me!! ...  
  
Kaoru: oo( )  
  
Allison: Well I just take advantage of this preoccupation to thank all of the nice people who read AND reviewed my story. Well I'd better go... tries to sneak out...  
  
Yahiko (who's head is the only part of his body above the ground): Hey! She's getting away! Get her!  
  
Sano: Hey! Where do you think you're going?  
  
Allison: To the potty, sir!  
  
Sano: I don't think so!  
  
Kaoru: Yeah! Even though I approve of Yahiko's chapter, giggles you're not gonna get away with mine!  
  
And they all run after the author..... and leave poor Yahiko alone....  
  
Yahiko: Hey! Where are you going? Get me outta here!!!! ....please? sighs   
  
- For those of you who noticed (and those Trigun fans), I added a quote  
from one of my favorite episodes..... review puh-leeeaaase?  
  
The next chapter will FINALLY be Kenshin bunch of fan girls scream wildly due to suggests. If you have any requests or good quotes and that I would find appropriate (after all, there are young readers out there) e-mail them to me. You can find my address in my profile, just click my pen-name all the way at the top. You can also add any comments. 


End file.
